Poem #254 Brings a Snow Day for Sledding

Snow Day

by Amy LV

This poem is dedicated to Mrs. Overman's second grade class in Indiana.  Last week (during nonfiction week), these young writers requested that I write a poem about a snow day.  We actually had a couple of snow days around here last week, and there could be more on the way.  This means that there may be more snow day poems on the way too.  Thank you to my Indiana friends, for offering me this great idea for a poem!

Students - while you might not always want to take topic ideas from others (I usually don't), sometimes one will strike you as perfect for that time in your life.  With all of the snow we've been having, this idea made perfect sense.  It was funny writing this poem because snips of it appeared in my mind on Monday night.  Right before creeping under my cozy covers, I thought, "Inside, ride, wide...those words will go in an upcoming poem!"

Another something strange happened with this poem too.  Last evening I sat in our puffy purple chair to write.  Our daughter Georgia (10), sat on the couch across the room.  We were both writing poems, but neither of us spoke one word to each other.  Georgia's school assignment was to write a rhyming nature poem which did not tell the name of the object in the poem, and here is what she wrote:

                                                     It blooms

                                                     unfolds

                                                     opens wide

                                                     all the world

                                                     sees what's inside

                                                     stamens, pistil

                                                     filled with pride

                                                     and then at night

                                                     it hides.

                                                     by Georgia LV

Did you notice that both of our poems use the rhyme ide?  We even chose two of the same words: inside & wide.  Considering we did not talk one bit about our poems, this amazed us both.  What a coincidence! One thing I love about Georgia's poem is that she has a very regular pattern of rhythm until the very last line, it hides.  This line is shorter than the others and helps her poem to break its pattern and feel beautifully finished.

When writing a rhyming poem, it is important to make sense.  Sometimes we want so badly to rhyme that we pick any old thing, any old two words and just mash them together.  Then we end up with weird lines like this:

                                 I love to read books under the table.

                                 It will not fall for it is stable.

Now do you ever worry about tables falling?  Probably not.  Therefore, this rhyme is a bit forced, and if I wrote it, I'd rewrite to say something more meaningful.  Maybe this:

                                 I'm under the table reading a book.

                                 No one will find me.  No one will look.

Rhyming poems are only one kind of poem.  Many of the most wonderful poems do not rhyme at all.  However, when I write a rhyming poem, I want it to be meaningful: funny, serious, playful, happy, sad... I don't want it to just sound like I slapped any old rhymes together.  That's what matters most to me - that my words make sense and connect with another human being.  Please let me know if you try writing a rhyming poem and what you learn as you write. 

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Poet Lee Bennett Hopkins on Poem #239

Late last evening, I wrote an extra post including yesterday's poem and some wise revision suggestions from master poet and anthologist Lee Bennett Hopkins who has been my generous teacher for several years.

Today I feel fortunate to welcome my teacher back as he shares his thoughts on today's poem.  Below you will see the original poem followed by Lee's suggestions followed by the revised poem based on Lee's revisions. 

Students and Teachers - I encourage you to look at these two drafts carefully together, noticing how the deletion of one word or one line can strengthen a whole poem.  One thing Lee has taught me is that "less is more", a lesson I need to learn and relearn.

Again and again, Lee teaches me the importance of spacing.  In this revised version, notice how how the repeated words door and rope are centered, thus highlighting the repeated movement. Notice, too, which lines are are lighter, leaner.

Thank you, Lee Bennett Hopkins, for your generosity in sharing your insights with me - and with students and teachers - today.

If you try this, revising your own poem by deleting unnecessary words, we would love to hear about it.  If you're a teacher-writer or if you have a student who has tried such revision, please share...about the experience or even the poems before-and-after!

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Fly with Sparrows & a Hawk - Poem #238

Sparrows & Hawk

by Amy LV

The other day I was sitting on a Florida sidewalk with my little notebook open on my lap, wondering what to write.  I looked up as one looks in the refrigerator to find better food than was in the refrigerator last time, and I saw a big bird coasting on the winds.  Seeing that big bird all alone made me wonder if s/he was lonely and it made me think about how sometimes crows and other small birds chase and harass hawks away.  My husband, a science teacher, has pointed this out to us several times.  

Students - we don't have to know what to write before we get started.  Half of writing is having an openness to what is before us, listening always, ready to accept a poem or a story when it sails by.  This is why it is important to have quiet spaces both in and around us.  

At NCTE on Saturday, artist David Diaz (illustrator of 2009 poetry book SHARING THE SEASONS edited by Lee Bennett Hopkins) spoke about this idea of "percolating".  In a session about creating art, he remarked, "Part of the process is not working...any given day, there may be 3-4 hours in the garden.  It (the work) is always there...Work in the garden is work because then you're thinking about it."

While at NCTE, I also had the opportunity to attend a wonderful session on Friday titled "Poets and Bloggers Unite" with poets Sylvia Vardell (Poetry for Children), Elaine Magliaro (Wild Rose Reader), and Tricia Stohr-Hunt (The Miss Rumphius Effect) along with poets Lee Bennett Hopkins, Pat Mora, Marilyn Singer, and Jame Richards.  

The bloggers, who have been featuring the poets for a few weeks and will continue to do so this week, explained the purposes of their blogs, and the poets talked about their writing.  Many ideas were tossed up such as: finding ways to make blogs more interactive, sharing more podcasts and videos of poets reading their work (Sylvia was taping all along, and I look forward to seeing the footage on her blog!), the importance of poetry across the content areas, how much it matters for teachers to write alongside our students, and the need to explore all types of poetry, not only funny poems.

Toward the end of the session, Pat Mora reminded us how lucky we all are, calling her work as a writer "privileged work" and acknowledging that as we had this opportunity to talk about words, others were making our hotel beds and taking care of our needs.

We were also treated to readings from each of the poets' books: Jame's THREE RIVERS RISING (a novel in verse about the Johnstown flood), Pat Mora's DIZZY IN YOUR EYES: POEMS ABOUT LOVE (love poems for teens, highlighting various forms), Marilyn Singer's MIRROR, MIRROR: A  (fairy tale reversos, a form Marilyn invented), and Lee Bennett Hopkins's BEEN TO YESTERDAYS (Lee's award-winning autobiographical poems).

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Many congratulations to J. Patrick Lewis, winner of the 2011 NCTE Award for Excellence in Poetry for Children for his body of work!  You can read more about this at Poetry for Children or Wild Rose Reader.  And if you feel like a poetry stretch for yourself this week, head on over to The Miss Rumphius Effect where Tricia has posted a new one!

I will list this year's NCTE Poetry Notable books sometime soon, and this Friday will bring us a Poetry Peek into Reading Specialist Amy Zimmer Merrill's Poetry Breaks at Calvin Coolidge Elementary in Binghamton, NY!

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Read Seasons in Sunflowers...Poem #210

 August

Photo by Amy LV

 September

Photo by Amy LV

Driving around a couple of days ago, I saw this drooping sunflower.  I felt sad when I remembered its glory just two months before.  Then I felt happy, thinking about ten months from now, when all of its sunflower babies will be standing tall, some nearby and some far away.

Students - This poem is simply a description, a word picture, of one sunflower at two times in its life.  You probably noticed that this poem is divided into two stanzas, and each one takes place during a different month. In this poem, I wished to snap a wordshot of how a sunflower's head position changes over time.

Something about words here too: while this poem does not rhyme at the ends of its lines, you will hear that the first stanza rhymes some internal vowels: gazes, straight, and face.  In the second stanza, you hear more repetition of sounds: seeds, deeply, and weep.

A writer thinks much like being a scientist.  Look closely.  Quiet down.  Observe.  Today on the playground or later at home, stare at things.  Let one image capture you like a prisoner, and do not look away.  If you are reading this in writing workshop now, walk over to the window or take a walk outside.  Be wowed by an image.  Then write your description, as finely and truly as you are able.

As always, I would love to read any student poems that grow from your visits here.  Teachers, please leave a note in the comments if you are willing to share student work on a Poetry Peek Friday!

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Mail - My Poem Writing Year #195

Original Handwritten Letter 

John Conolly to Edythe Toebe

E-mail Version 

John Conolly's Letter to Edythe Toebe

Students - One of my favorite poems is "Alley Violinist" by Robert Lax.  I love this poem because it asks the reader a direct question, and after you read the last line, you need to answer the question to yourself.  What would I do?

What do you wonder?  Sometimes it is fun to ask your reader a question straight-out in the body of a poem.  Be direct.  See what your readers say.

This is a compare/contrast poem, much like "Two Clocks",  which compares analog and digital clocks.  It's fun to take two different-yet-alike things, such as clocks or mail, and to explore their similarities and differences.  Just think about your life.  What things are different than they were long ago?  How is this good?  How is it not-so-good?

In case you were wondering, the letter above is a real letter written by my great grandfather to my great aunt.  I scanned in the original handwritten version as well as a typed version so that you could think about and talk about which you would rather receive.  It's an interesting question with no right answer, just a personal answer.

For another poem about mail, the mailbox kind, take a walk back in time to Poem #28, "Snail Mail".

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